


Until We Meet Again

by kjstark



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Bucky Barnes & Steve Rogers Friendship, Canonical Character Death, Gen, Hallucinations, James "Rhodey" Rhodes & Tony Stark Friendship, Light Angst, M/M, Not A Fix-It, Not Beta Read, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-15
Updated: 2019-05-15
Packaged: 2020-03-05 18:48:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18834592
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kjstark/pseuds/kjstark
Summary: Then Rhodey lets out a sob – painful and private and if Bucky was a sane person he would’ve just used every once of his soviet training to leave the room unnoticed.But Rhodey is breaking for the same reason Bucky breaks every night, so Bucky feels kind of personally bound to do something.Bucky and Rhodey bond over losing Steve and Tony.





	Until We Meet Again

**Author's Note:**

> **STORY WARNINGS FOR** :
> 
> * MAJOR Avengers: Endgame (2019) spoilers.   
> 
>   
> 
> * Self-deprecating attitudes on both main characters.
>   
> 
> * Brief hallucination. 
> 
>  
> 
> This work is unbeta'd and English isn't my first language. I apologize in advance if you see something yuchy.

“Rhodey!” Wanda shouts when Rhodes falls hard with a thud on the ground. Bucky turns just in time to see an AIM agent make a run and one forming up to shoot at the colonel.

Bucky lifts up his rifle and shoots the agent sharply just before he can take his own shot.

“Shit!” Rhodey yells as his faceplate lifts.

Bucky runs towards him laying on the ground and Sam lands next to Rhodey just before he reaches him.

“What happened?” Sam asks, kneeling down next to Rhodes.

“He took the formula,” Rhodes says, visibly through pain.

Bucky looks around to find utter chaos. “This place is gonna blow up any minute,” he mutters, letting out a breath.

“Bucky is right,” Wanda replies through the comes, just before flying back to stand with them.

“Rhodey, can you move?” Sam asks.

Rhodes bites his lower lip and shakes his head. “They did something to my prosthetic. I think it’s fried,” he says.

Bucky looks at Wanda for help. “Plato, get medical,” Wanda instructs the newest AI, and then she’s whooshing Rhodey out of the building before it collapses in on them.

\--

“So, essentially, you blew up the mission?” Fury’s hologram says.

Bucky tries his best not to roll his eyes. Sam is standing next to Rhodey, sitting on a stool, his prosthetic slowly back on working.

“Not if you consider the fact that the base was destroyed,” Sharon says from the desk, her arms crossed.

“But you let one escape with the formula we were supposed to keep off the streets,” Fury retorts and Rhodey leaps off the stool and kicks the table.

“It’s my fault,” Rhodes spits.

Fury looks at him. “That changes nothing, Colonel,” he says, almost careless and the room falls silent.

Fury won’t say it but Bucky knows they’re the worst Avengers team and they haven’t even properly started.

“I will contact you as soon as Hill gathers more intel,” Fury says, sighing and then the hologram disappears.

Once it does, Rhodes hits the table again. “I can’t believe I let this happen. I saw his ass coming right towards me but I was too slow before he shot me with that weird taser thing,” he says.

Sam tilts his head. “Don’t be hard on yourself. That could’ve happened to any of us,” he says but Rhodes looks at him like he just said something worse.

Rhodey shakes his head and looks around. “This is ridiculous,” he mutters.

“What do you mean?” Wanda inquires, sitting across the room, rubbing her foot.

“Pretending like we’re doing good without them. It’s a fucking mess,” Rhodey says without the slightest touch.

When the room falls silent, Rhodey just lets out a breath and storms off the meetings room, passing by Bucky by the door frame just casually resting against it, his arms crossed.

Bucky’s gotta give it to him. It took six entire months for Rhodey to finally say what Bucky’s known all along since day fucking one.

Pretending like they’re not gonna set the world on fire just by themselves any minute now was all Bucky realized they were doing. That’s how they were coping.

And Bucky knows shit about recovery and moving on but he knows they’re all going wrong at it.

Wanda looks like she’s ten years older than she actually is. Every time she comes back from her weekly visits to Clint, she gets all moody and doesn’t sleep for two days straight, Bruce keeps moving from city to city all paranoid that they’re gonna come for him any moment, Thor’s still God fucking knows where, T’Challa’s too busy keeping chaos out of his side of the world to care and only ever has Okoye participate in the occasional sessions and Sam hasn’t even bothered to even fucking touch the shield.

“He gave it to you for a reason, ya’ know?” Bucky told him once.

Sam just looked at it and shrugged. “I’ll use it when I need it,” he had said.

Bucky can think of fourteen different times after that where Sam really could’ve used a stupid vibranium shield.

But who is he to judge, really? When he hasn’t had a proper moment to himself to sit and think without being overwhelmed and suffocated like he’s a five year old kid.

So, what has he been up to? Feeding pigeons at the park. Going to the theatre once in a while. Eating a lot of ice cream.

Practice shooting every day, from six pm until his hands tremble and all he’s left to think about is how much he’d rather do all that with Steve instead.

So he gets it.

And that’s what he thinks as soon as he sees — entirely by accident, he’d come just looking for his iPod —  Rhodey viciously punching Natasha’s old bag just a few hours later.

Rhodey throws a punch and his back muscles shake with its force, Bucky even wrinkles his nose at it. Then Rhodey lets out a sob – painful and private and if Bucky was a sane person he would’ve just used every once of his soviet training to leave the room unnoticed.

But Rhodey is breaking for the same reason Bucky breaks every night, so Bucky feels kind of personally bound to do something.

“If you separate your feet a little more the blow won’t overpower you as much. You gotta stand your ground,” Bucky speaks and Rhodey turns back quickly. His face is dripping with sweat and his eyes are red.

Rhodey swallows. “What are you doing here?” he asks. Okay, so it’s about right. Bucky doesn’t really come to Natasha’s personal gym, he was actually gonna temporarily steal Sam’s iPod because he has no idea where he left his own.

Bucky just shrugs, however. “There isn’t much to do around here,” he says.

Rhodey raises his eyebrows and turns back to the bag. “Don’t you have pigeons to feed or something?” he asks, throwing two more punches.

Bucky chuckles in return. He’s the remaining senior citizen of the group so, he might as well own it. “No, Sam already ate,” Bucky jokes.

Rhodey turns to give him a look, like that’s a cheap shot but it’s still amusing.

Which Bucky considers summarizes his humor technique perfectly.

Rhodey goes back to his bag without saying much and then Bucky figures that should be it. But Bucky can be stubborn when he wants to. “Actually, I wanted to tell you that I agree,” Bucky says, taking a few steps towards him. “Whatever it is we’re doing, we’re pulling it right out of asses and it’s gonna be sooner than later before it blows on our faces,” he adds.

Rhodey turns to him and drops his arms, tired. “I don’t intend to be mean about it,” he says but Bucky knows. There’s no harm in the truth.

Bucky nods at him and Rhodey just gives him a look, his eyes boring into Bucky’s and there’s so much hurt Bucky wonders if he’s maybe just looking back to a reflection of his own.

Rhodey stands strong so focused so often that it’s easy to forget how much he’s lost.

Bucky grabs a towel by the table and hands it to Rhodey. “I know you don’t,” Bucky assures.

Rhodey wipes his forehead then looks down at the towel and Bucky doesn’t miss when Rhodey frowns and bites the inside of his lip, to keep himself from crying again.

Part of him wants to leave Rhodey to his devices, grant him some sort of lonely peace, but another part of him wants to reach out and give him a goddamned hug.

Maybe even cry along with him.

“All the training I got didn’t prep me for alien invasions and magic and monsters and crazy biological weapons and everybody’s counting on us to keep up the front now and I—,” Rhodey says, shaking his head. “I just feel so fucking _inadequate_ ,” Rhodey adds, angrily, and throws the towel to the floor.

Bucky wants to laugh at that.

If there’s someone close to being adequate for this, it’s Rhodes. At least from where Bucky’s standing.

Rhodey lets out another breath and Bucky sits on the bench in front of Rhodey and the bag. “I get it. I miss Steve,” he says, his shoulders down.

Because that’s what they’re _really_ talking about.

Rhodey gives him a look, stoic, and Bucky figures he won’t talk now, so Bucky takes another breath.

“You know, sometimes I think about taking a page out of his book,” Bucky continues. “Go back to some time that suits me, try to live a life not haunted by a past I can’t change,” he trails, moving his hand as he speaks.

Rhodey swallows and sits next to him quietly.

“Then I think of going back to where he is and just —  yell at him for being an asshole and leaving me all alone, to fend for Sam, no less,” Bucky says, widening his eyes at the last mention.

Rhodey chuckles despite the tears that are forming in his eyes.

“I resent him, on the bad days,” Bucky confesses, looking down. “I feel like I could genuinely punch him for forcing me into being here without him, forcing me into _carrying on_ without him,” he adds, his eyes watering up, too. “I mean, I never even wanted to be a part of this in the first place, ya’ know? I keep looking around for him and I can’t see him and I keep thinking, just—,”

“ _'What the hell am I doing here?'_ ” Rhodey cuts in, whispering, his eyes cast down, too.

Bucky gives him a glance and nods. “Yeah,” he mutters. “I’ve spent so much of my conscious life on Steve that I don’t—I don’t even know what to be without him,” Bucky adds, his voice faint.

Rhodey nods next to him. “It’s not just him that’s gone, it’s also you. That big part of you that depended on him being there,” Rhodey says and Bucky knows how heavy the words feel on Rhodey’s tongue.

He knows Rhodey’s talking from his first-hand experience. He knows Rhodey’s projecting on him, but he’s right.

Stark is dead and it definitely sucks more than Steve fucking off to another universe to retire. But gone is gone, no matter how you slice it.  

And it takes miserable and lonely to know miserable and lonely.

“So, how do you deal with it?” Rhodey asks, looking at his hands.

Bucky chuckles. “Do I look like I do?” Bucky replies, turning back to him.

Rhodey turns to look back and sighs, gives him an absolutely broken smile and Bucky forgets what the fucking plan even was.

With a light pat on Bucky’s shoulder, Rhodey leaves the room sweaty and tired and sad.

\--

Agent Hill sends them to Brussels two weeks later, after she gathered enough intel on where AIM planned to use their biological weapon.

“There’s a meeting happening near the Grand Place with EU diplomats. My best guess is they’re gonna let it out there,” Fury says on their coms as they make their way through the building.

“Do we know what it does?” Bucky wonders from the third floor as Rhodey scans the floors below.

“Unclear. All options are, well, terrible,” Hill whispers.

“We’ve got company, people,” Sharon says just a few seconds later and Rhodey can hear her grunt and huff a breath as she kicks some losers asses.

Then the action unfolds and Rhodey takes a deep breath as he takes his shots at the AIM goons, Sam flying just right above him. “We need to take the people outta here! Lang, Hope,” Rhodey calls.

“We’re on it!” the Wasp answers, shrinking and going back to her size to take down two agents.

“Shit!” Bucky shouts from his left and next thing everything’s on fire.

Rhodey scans the main floor, everyone’s exiting the building swiftly, as the place starts collapsing.

“I got the second floor cleared,” Wanda informs.

“Good. Sam?” Rhodey says, using the suits automatic target system to take down five agents.

“Almost done,” Sam replies.

Bucky’s finishes stabbing one goon and then walks over to Rhodey. “I know everything’s on fire but, are we doing good?” he asks, panting and Rhodey actually smiles behind the faceplate.

“People are secure over here. Birdy Cap?” Sharon asks.

Rhodey and Bucky exchange a look as they reach the ground floor. “You know, I actually was a Tech sergeant, so, technically is Birdy sergeant. But yeah, we’re all good here. I’m taking this asshole to you, now,” Sam says.

Rhodey lets out a breath, relieved.

But a second after, a bomb goes off and the walls start falling apart around them. “We gotta get out of here,” Rhodey says and fog starts filling up the room, it’s so thick Rhodey actually has to turn on his night-vision. “Barnes?” he calls, when he can’t see Bucky.

Rhodey turns a few times before he spots him, just standing a few feet away, motionless.

“Barnes, what the hell are you doing? We gotta go!” Rhodey shouts through his helmet.

But Bucky isn’t moving, isn’t even blinking. He’s just standing staring at nothingness with glassy eyes and Rhodey swallows, thinking there’s a Winter Soldier situation coming over.

As Rhodey’s about to reach Sam on a private comm, Bucky speaks: “Steve?” he asks an empty space and Rhodey’s blood runs cold. “You’re here,” he adds, so soft Rhodey can barely register it.

He takes a step towards him and a another wall falls, this time between them. “Hill, the weapon. Is one of the options hallucinations?” he asks.

“Yes. Why? Where the hell are you, guys? The roof is a wreck, you can’t last there, Rhodey!” she shouts.

“Barnes!” Rhodey screams. “Man, listen to me, we gotta get out of here!” Rhodey speaks but Bucky’s falling to his knees and crying, the fire keeps growing around him, cornering him.

Rhodey takes a few steps more, tries to move around the wreckage to get a little closer. “This place isn’t gonna hold much longer, Barnes. We have to leave now!” he repeats, desperate.

Bucky shakes his head, his cheeks soaking. “Rhodes, he’s here. Steve’s back. Sam!” he says, a big smile on his face. The roof starts falling then, glass breaking as the place turns hotter.

Rhodey lifts his faceplate then. “No, he’s not, Bucky,” he says, doing his best to hold his breath. “He’s not real. Steve isn’t here,” Rhodey tells him, slowly, letting the tears roll down his face. “He’s gone, Bucky. He’s not coming back,” he adds, coming closer.

Bucky looks at him puzzled, and goes back to staring at the empty space in front of him. “No, no,” he mutters, his hands shaking.

“I’m so sorry, man,” Rhodey whispers, his breath caught up in his throat.

Bucky looks up at him and then Rhodey sees him.

Tony.

Standing next to Bucky kneeling. “Did you miss me?” Tony says and Rhodey lets out a whimper.

Rhodey shuts his eyes close and feels his cheeks wet. “Bucky, listen to me. They’re not here, okay? They never will be. And it’s fucked up and it hurts like nothing’s ever hurt before and I have no fucking clue how we’ll survive this but we have to. By them, we _have_ to,” he says, pleading, his hand stretched for Bucky to grab.

Bucky looks at his hand and then down, his lower lip trembles as his tears keep rolling.

“We can’t let them down, now, c’mon,” Rhodey adds, stretching his hand towards him longer.

Bucky raises his hand slowly and Rhodey holds it tightly, gets a proper grip and flies them both out before he gets used to Tony’s soft deery eyes again.

And if Bucky is holding onto him tighter than he needs to while they’re in the air, Rhodey doesn’t seem to bother.

\--

“Well, look who it is,” Bucky hears behind him, sitting on the bench.

When he turns, Rhodey stands with one hand on his pocket and the other holding tightly to one tiny Morgan Stark. “Hey, there,” Bucky greets, a smile on his face.

Morgan has grown a few inches taller and she’s wearing one long ponytail as she licks her lollipop.

“Wow, you’re so big already,” Bucky says, turning on his bench to address Morgan.

She smiles and all Bucky can see is Stark on her. “I turn 6 in one hundred and fifty two days,” Morgan says, proudly.

Bucky just raises his eyebrows and looks at Rhodey, who’s just shrugs. “She takes after her dad,” Rhodey says.

Bucky chuckles and looks back to Morgan, giving another lick to her candy. “Were you friends with him, too?” she asks him.

Bucky looks at the floor and curves his lips into a loop-sided smile. “No, I—I didn’t have that privilege,” he says and Morgan moves her eyes to the right, understanding.

“Well, you’re a superhero, too, right?” she asks then, almost excitedly.

Bucky looks up at Rhodey, who just looks at him expectant. “You know what,” Bucky says, looking down at Morgan, again. “If you think I am, then – for you – I will be,” he tells her, tapping on her nose with his metal arm and getting a giggle out of Morgan. “Hey,” he says, opening his palm at her, showing the seeds he was holding. “Wanna feed them?” Bucky asks.

Morgan smiles widely and then looks up to Rhodey. “Uncle Rhodey, can I, can I, _please_?” she says, tugging Rhodey’s pants as she pleads.

Rhodey smiles at her and nods. “Sure, kiddo,” he says and Morgan grabs all the seeds Bucky was holding with both of her tiny hands and starts throwing them to the floor, quickly earning the pigeons attention.

Rhodey sits next to Bucky with a sigh, his eyes locked on Morgan laughing when the birds fly too close to her.

“You know what I kept thinking when—whenever I let myself break down?” Rhodey says, unprompted. Bucky quirks one eyebrow at him. “That Tony was seeing me. And I felt so helpless and embarrassed and just, pissed,” he confesses. “I got in this game to keep him safe – mostly from himself – and now there’s no one to keep safe and I keep reevaluating my purposes because,” Rhodey turns to look at him and do a little shake of his head. “Bucky, I’m so far from being just an Air Force officer, now. It feels stupid, you know?”

He does. As much as Bucky tries, he knows he can’t just go back to living in the shadows and just worrying about plums.

“So, yeah, I don’t know how I’ll do even half of this without Tony but I have to. ‘Cause he’s counting on me to,” Rhodey says. “Because even gone, he needs my help— _they_ need our help,” he adds, his brown eyes boring into Bucky’s. “And I mean, yeah, we’re gonna screw things up but—that’s part of keeping their legacy alive, isn’t it? I mean, they did screw up _big_ some times.”

Bucky actually cracks a laugh at that. He looks to the front, past Morgan’s careful steps around pigeons and into the sun setting by the horizon.

“We’re gonna do it better than them. And when we see them again, we’ll rub it in their faces,” Bucky jokes and he can picture Steve’s wrinkled face and his eye roll and the playful shove he’d do before hugging him.

Rhodey smiles and pats Bucky in the shoulder again. Then he looks at Morgan and remembers Autumn at MIT and big, soft eyes going on about thermodynamics and motorcycles and fashion in the same caffeined breath.

“Yeah. When we see them again,” Rhodey repeats, and next to Bucky, hearing Tony in Morgan's giggles, he doesn't feel so alone. 

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from "Who Knew" by P!nk


End file.
